Are you an Introvert or an Extrovert?
I think i am both.
I love being around people. But also hate being around them.
I’ll go out, vibe and meet new people. But it comes with an expiration,i feel the need to recharge instantly.
If you’re an introverted extrovert like me, you know how confusing this is for people. Everyone expects an introvert to be shy and reclusive. And we can be, but we also like to get out there and mix n mingle. When we’re “on”, we are sociable, and friendly. When we’re “off”, we hurry home to recharge in solitude.
Even though we spend way more time introverting than following the crowd, people only see our outgoing side. They don’t realize that our social batteries are drained very quickly.
I remember i wanted to be invited everywhere..and got offended when I din’t. 🙊 #lol
But at the same time i din’t want to go anywhere.
Like.. don’t invite me anywhere last minute. I enjoy doing nothing so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.
I mean yes.. I like socialising,but there is nothing I love more than chilling at home.
oh & I am the most excited when plans get cancelled. Coz I never wanted to go in the first place.
I greatly appreciate silence for instance my ideal conversation at a social event
Someone at social event:……….
Someone at social event:………
*best conversation ever*
But was I always like that..??
Parties dint really excite me, its far too many people that I am ready to interact with.
They just make me anxious. And being in the fashion industry that dint really fly well for me.
I remember feeling so worried that I know I would be so tired after experiencing all that stimulation. And I just knew it would drain me of the precious energy that I need to feel fully alive the next day.
I don’t think anyone could truly relate to what i was feeling.
And once I mustured up the courage to open my door and be around everybody. I actually wasn’t really that shy at all. I am okay with public speaking, Like I would chit chat with everybody and make decent conversation. It was like I was rediscovering myself.
I was never the life of the party but I definitely dint make it worse. Until that is… I was ready to leave.
I felt a pang of emotion come over me. I heard my body screaming at me. Asma you are done here. Abort mission. Retreat back to safety and retrieve back to your quiet. So you can feel happy and alive tomorrow.
In a world where we reward extroverts, introverts can feel out of place and disconnected.
Why can’t I be more enthusiastic? Why do I feel so reserved when asked to go to a party?why do I rack my brains in order to get out of social situations? Why am I not like everyone else?
After a while I finally allowed my self the judgemental eyes when I said i don’t want to go to a party.
At first I was not super confident in my delivery. I would say things like I am not well or I have prior commitments. I would create these excuses and stories and not say my truth.
My big goal is to finally be able to say ” I just don’t want to go. I want to stay at home.
We don’t need to feel shame and guilt for not being outgoing in a society that praises those who are.
We have some truly incredible qualities like deep thinking, strong connection,self awareness,ability to enjoy alone time.Being able to truly listen.Make powerful decision.Calm and deliberate speaking. Working alone and much more.
Stand strong in your personality traits and view them as strength.Just because you are not naturally assertive outgoing or life of the party doesn’t mean you can’t make it big.
Your most natural state of being is where you are going to feel the most in flow and the most authentically yourself.
You can shine strongly regardless of how you identify yourself.
So in conclusion…
Ain’t no party like….there actually being no party and you are at home in your clean pajamas about to get into fresh bedsheets!😘
With Love & Peace